Efficient Household and Parenting Hacks for Busy Parents of Twins, Triplets or More

On today's episode, I dive into one of the most requested topics: time-saving tips and parenting hacks for parents of multiples. 

I go over five ways you can make your day-to-day life easier whether you have newborns or your multiples are older. 

I also talk about how to streamline routines for your children to help reduce chaos and make life more manageable. 

Thanks for listening! If you are a soon-to-be or current parent of multiples, be sure to head over to my website http://www.fiercekindmama.com to get my FREE resources designed specifically for you!

Be sure to follow me on Instagram and Facebook too.

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Transcript

Efficient Household and Parenting Hacks for Busy Parents of Twins, Triplets or More

Dr Cristina Cavezza

Welcome to the Fierce Kind Mama of Multiples podcast. This podcast is for anyone raising multiples, twins, triplets or more. I speak to inspiring parents of multiples who have healed from unexpected pregnancies and birthing experiences and who candidly share the highs and lows of raising multiples.

I also speak to the professionals that work with multiple birth families.

Together we cover the practicalities of raising more than one baby at a time, as well as enhancing the emotional wellbeing of caregivers and children alike.

Come join us as we laugh, cry and share our personal and professional wisdom on all things multiples. I'm your host Dr Cristina Cavezza, and I am a Fierce Kind Mama of Multiples.

Welcome to another episode of the Fierce, Kind Mama of Multiples Podcast. I'm your host, Dr Cristina Cavezza, and today we're diving into one of the most requested topics: time-saving tips and parenting hacks for parents of multiples. Now if you ‘ve been listening to my podcast for awhile you probably know that I don’t normally do episodes like this where I simply list some practical strategies. This is because I am a firm believer in what works for some may not work for others and you really need an individualised approach that will work for your specific family needs. Also, there is so much information that can be sourced online around tips and tricks for making life easier so to be perfectly honest, I’ve hesitated putting together an episode like this because I feel like it will simply cover things that you already know or have heard previously or that you can easily source online. But I also want to give you what you want, and I do get asked this question a lot, particularly from parents who are expecting multiples and really want to be prepared practically. So that tells me that this topic is important to you, and I am all about helping to make your life more manageable. Now, whether you are expecting or already have twins, triplets, or more, managing your household can sometimes feel like an Olympic sport. But don't worry, today I will go over some simple efficient household and parenting hacks to help streamline your routines and hopefully make life a bit easier. I also want to highlight here that I am going over some general parenting hacks and tips, some of which are more suitable for the newborn phase of parenting multiples and others are more for older kids. If you are interested in finding out more about how to streamline feeding and parenting newborn multiples, then let me know because I might consider doing another podcast episode on this later this season if you think that might be of interest to you.  The easiest way to do this is to follow the podcast or get added to my mailing list which you can do via the contact page on my website www.fiercekindmama.com

Before we get started, I want to also remind you about a free resource I have available for those of you who are pregnant with multiples. 

If you want to learn more about how to be fully prepared for your multiple birth journey, then this guide is for you. In this guide, I take a holistic approach to help you prepare physically, financially, and emotionally. 

And if you know anyone else who might benefit from this guide, please tell them to head over to my website: www.fiercekindmama.com 

And click on the free resources tab. 

I also want to share with you some feedback I’ve received from Karen in Australia, mum of 9-month-old twin girls. She writes “I just finished listening to your first podcast and just want to say I felt so seen, It felt like you were speaking all my thoughts and experiences from pregnancy on. I wish I had found you earlier in this process. I have recommended you to the other multiple parents I know. I have listened to other podcasts but yours is something special. Thank you for sharing in this podcast you are amazing.”

Thank you so much Karen for this wonderful feedback. I am so happy you are here and enjoying this content. 

And for anyone else listening, please feel free to get in touch with me on social media or via my website with your comments, feedback and suggestions. I absolutely love hearing from you!

Ok, let’s talk about some efficient household and parenting hacks that can save you time and energy. These tips are designed to help you stay organized and keep things running smoothly, even when you're juggling multiple kids at once.

1.     Create a Family Command Centre One of the best ways to stay organized is to set up a family command centre. I know some of you listening might be thinking what the hell does that mean? So, let me explain. A Family Command Centre for the purposes of what I am speaking about is essentially a central location in your home where you can keep track of everyone's schedules, important information, and to-do lists. Practically, this might look like a large calendar where you mark down appointments, school events, and any activities for each child that you might need to remember. You can also include a whiteboard or corkboard for reminders and notes. Now if you are expecting multiples, my biggest tip for you is to not underestimate how tired and exhausted you will be in those early days. Also, if your babies come early as the majority of multiples do, then it can become really important to keep data on when your babies fed, for how long, when they had a wet or soiled nappy or diaper and so on. You may often be asked this information at appointments with health nurses or doctors and you should not underestimate how difficult it will be to keep track of this information when you have had very little sleep night after night. For example, if you are trying to establish breastfeeding, it can be helpful to swap which baby goes on which boob at each feed and in that case it becomes super important to keep track of that information. You don’t want to be relying on memory alone. I spoke with one mother of triplets who said that she set up the babies’ room so that when she walked in the triplet who was born first was the closest to door, beside them was the second born triplet, and beside them, was the third born triplet. And she would feed them in that order as a way to reduce the mental load. And let’s be honest, when you are parenting triplet newborns, we can imagine that it really is about keeping some kind of mental routine if you like in your mind so that you can survive and maintain some kind of sanity. When we first brought our twins home and we were trying to establish breastfeeding, I remember being so tired and exhausted that I would sometimes forget which baby I had put on the breast, how long he was on the breast for and so on. And this was important, because we were also told to top up with formula. There were many reasons for that but essentially in those early days my supply wasn’t great, and my babies didn’t latch well. It was really important that we had all the data if you like about when they fed and for how long and what quantity of formula they drank so that we could keep track of their development and make changes if we needed to. We were keeping track of everything including if their nappy or diaper was wet or soiled. And as I said before when you are sleep deprived and not running at full capacity so to speak, your memory for those details quickly fades. So, at that time our family command centre was right outside the room where we and our babies slept. We had a desk there, and we kept a clipboard with a piece of paper for each day and we divided the paper in half. We had Twin A on one half and Twin B on the other half. Now, of course, if you have triplets or more then you are obviously going to need more paper and you might even like to have two clipboards. Most likely you’ll probably find an app or use a note taking device in your phone. But the idea here is that we kept this clipboard and a pen at that desk all the time and as soon as a feed was completed, one of us would document what happened. And this was a simple way for us to keep track of our babies’ development. And as my boys have grown, our family command centre obviously looks a bit different. For one thing it’s moved to the kitchen where we keep track of important information from the kids’ school on the fridge. But I also rely heavily on an online calendar that I use to keep track of important information and as much as possible I try to keep important documents in a digital format so that we don’t lose important information. If you are in a partnership, then an online calendar that can be shared is super handy and of course, if you have important documentation digitised then this can easily be kept on a shared device or at the very least on the cloud with access for both parents or others that may need the information like extended family, for example. 

So, moving on to the second tip. 

2.     Meal Planning and Prep Meal planning, I believe, is a game-changer for busy parents. If you can spend some time each week planning out your meals and creating a shopping list that will save you so much time later. Online shopping is another time saver that I know many parents utilise and you can buy things like diapers or nappies or even formula in bulk. While I am on the topic of baby products be sure to check out if you can access a multiple birth discount with the various companies. Here in Australia, for example, some formula manufacturers offer a discount for multiple-birth families. You need to provide a letter from a doctor confirming your babies are fed with formula and you may also need to provide a copy of their birth certificate. But the formula can be ordered online and delivered to your home so that is super handy. Going back to meal planning though, I know it can sometimes feel like a lot of work planning out your meals in advance but there are so many benefits to doing this. First, you are going to reduce food wastage because you are less likely to buy food items that end up going past their expiry date. Second, depending on what you buy, you are more likely to prepare healthy meals for your family and avoid take out, take away or convenience foods that are usually full of not so wholesome ingredients.  Third, you are going to save yourself a lot of mental energy when you plan your food in advance. I remember when I was pregnant the best thing I ever did was I ended up having to finish work early around the 28 week mark, not because I was having complications, that unfortunately came a few weeks later, but the doctors recommended that I finish work early because I worked in a pretty risky environment and they said that there is a high chance my babies could come early so it was safer if I ended work earlier. By this point too I was so fatigued, heavy and in so much pain that honestly, I wasn’t even sure how I was going to survive the rest of the pregnancy. But going back to the best thing I ever did. I decided to use the few weeks at home before my babies were born prematurely to batch cook a number of meals. My partner and I didn’t really have any family nearby that could come over and help us, so I knew that once the babies were home, the last thing we wanted to worry about was what to make for dinner. So, I literally spent each day preparing a big batch of something. Like soup, chilli, pasta sauces, lasagne. Basically, anything that I could freeze, I did. I also invested in a second freezer so that I had enough storage space. And once we did bring our babies home, we had enough meals for the first two months.  I cannot recommend this highly enough. It was literally the best decision I think I have ever made in my life. Prepping meals in advance can definitely save you a lot of time during the week, particularly if you make large batches of food that you can freeze and reheat later. This way, you always have a homemade meal ready to go, even on the busiest days. In terms of how you actually do this, I would suggest investing in something like a slow cooker or pressure cooker. I didn’t have one when I was pregnant. I simply used a big pot on the stovetop. But I have since come to appreciate the simplicity and ease of a slow cooker or pressure cooker. What I like about it is that you can put all your ingredients in when you wake up or at some point in the day and then voila a few hours later you have a meal. You don’t have to sit there and watch over it like you would if you had to cook on the stovetop so yes, I recommend buying one and if money is an issue, see if you can find one second-hand at an op-shop, garage sale or a buy sell swap group. 

I’ll quickly mention here too, and this doesn’t fall under the category of meal prepping but it does save a lot of time and that is, investing in a robotic vacuum cleaner. They typically connect to your home Wi-Fi and they have built-in sensors to detect dirt and to avoid objects and walls. They are great for getting into hard-to-reach places and you don’t even have to be home for it to vacuum and clean your floors and carpets. You can get ones that will wash the floor too. They can be a bit expensive but again I think they can be a handy, worthwhile investment so I would say try to get one during a sale. That’s what we did, and we put in on pretty much every night after dinner to clean up the mess on the kitchen floor and it's been so handy. 

Now, let’s move on to the number 3. This is one of my favourites. 

3.     Embrace the Power of Lists Lists are like my best friend when it comes to staying organized. There is something quite satisfying about writing a to-do list on pen and paper and then ticking off the items as I’ve done them. And I know that it might sound like such an outdated thing to do because everyone has smartphones now that can send you reminders of just about anything. And to be honest, I don’t care what you use. In fact, I create lists and reminders in my phone all the time. The idea here is that if you want to stay organised with the never-ending tasks then making a daily or weekly checklist of tasks that need to be done can be super handy. This can include household chores, errands, and any activities for your children. Having a list that you can look at can help ensure that nothing gets forgotten and helps you stay on track. Remember to keep that list in your shared family command centre on a whiteboard or on the fridge or in a shared calendar. The other thing that can be really helpful is if you do have visitors in those early days and they ask you, is there anything that I can do to help, you can point to your to-do list on the fridge and simply yes, feel free to choose something and tick it off when you are done please. I will also say here that don’t be afraid to ask visitors to choose something on the list to do to help you out. I know how hard it can be to do this. You might not be used to relying on other people to do simple tasks for you like fold your washing or to tidy the kitchen. But honestly, anyone with a newborn in my opinion has earned the right to rely on whomever they need to. And remember, if you are expecting multiples, you will have so much more on your plate than the average person. Ideally, you want to be free to focus on bonding with your babies and not cleaning or cooking. I mean you will have to do some of that unless you can outsource it all but most of us don’t have that luxury. So, please, please do not be afraid to say to friends and family that pay you and the babies a visit, something like “hey, there’s a bunch of stuff I need to do. I’ve put a list on the fridge. I’d be so grateful if you could help me out by picking one thing off the list and doing it while you are here.” I can almost guarantee that the better you get at asking for help, the more you will enjoy parenting multiples. 

Ok, so another time-saving hack is to simplify laundry and washing. 

4.     Simplify Laundry Laundry can feel like a never-ending chore, especially with multiple kids. One way to get on top of the endless washing is to first, make sure you are doing it regularly. I put on a load at least once a day for a family of four and that’s because we often have gym or sports clothes and school uniforms to wash. In those early days, you will have the babies’ clothes, burp cloths, their bedding, maybe cloth nappies and that will add up pretty quickly. Some people like to have designated specific days for washing certain items. For example, Monday might be for clothes, Wednesday for bedding, Friday for towels and Sunday for school uniforms or work clothes, for example. Now obviously in those early days you might need to put on washing after one or more of your babies has had an accident. So, it becomes even more important to make sure you are doing the other washing regularly so that you don’t end up backlogged if you like with a bunch of dirty clothing items. If you can invest in a washing machine with a delayed setting, I would recommend doing that because what I find helpful is putting on a load before I go to bed and setting it so that it is finished by the time I get up and then if it’s going to be a clear or warm day, I can hang it straight away or put it in the dryer if the weather is looking really dodgy. This then frees me up to put on another load of washing that maybe is unexpected like if the kids get sick over all over their bedding, for example. When your kids are old enough, you can involve them in sorting and folding laundry to teach them responsibility and to lighten your load. The earlier you do this, the better. I am a huge fan of doing chores alongside kids and getting them involved. 

Speaking of getting kids involved, another great time-saving hack for parents is number five. 

5. Use Bins and Labels Bins or containers and labels are great for organizing toys, clothes, and other household items. If you can find clear bins where you can easily see what's inside and label each bin with its contents, this can be great way to not only make it easier to find things quickly, but it also keeps your home tidy. And bonus points if you can encourage your children to put their toys and belongings back in the designated bins to maintain order. When my boys were toddlers, I remember part of the bedtime routine was to put everything away. So, we kind of made it a game before bathtime where we would sing a song and pack up the toys and their belongings. Now, I’m not going to lie and say that it was always smooth sailing and that they never resisted or that they were always happy to pack up because no, that’s simply not true. But it was an expectation that we reinforced, and it is ongoing. Now, that they are older, we expect them to do other chores before bed, and even if there is push back or resistance which there absolutely can be, the expectation is still there, and they are aware of it. There are no surprises when we say it’s time to clean up the kitchen and pack away our dishes and even if they do it begrudgingly, it still gets done as a family most of the time. 

And this brings me to talking about streamlining routines for your children because establishing consistent routines can help reduce chaos and make your day-to-day life much more manageable.

Hi there Fierce Kind Mama

Sorry to interrupt the discussion but I have something to share with you that I know you are going to love.

We are often told that parenting can be hard. 

And whether you are soon-to-be or current parent of multiples, there is going to come a time when you will probably feel stressed, overwhelmed, or even worried about the future.

That’s why I’ve developed a free guide for parents just like you with my 5 top tips for handling stress and overwhelm.  

You can download it now from my website www.fiercekindmama.com

Let’s start with a morning routine. 

1.     Morning Routine Mornings can be hectic, but having a structured routine can make a big difference and this is obviously going to look different depending on the age of your multiples. When they are newborns, you may not have much of a routine other than a repeating cycle of feeding, burping, changing and sleeping with lots of cuddles and play of course. But the play will look very different to the play that older babies, let’s say 6 months and older will engage in.  Once they are sitting up by themselves and rolling or crawling you might find that you are more able to get them out of the house for regular outdoor play and it's at this point, that having some kind of structure to the morning routine can be helpful. At this age your multiples are obviously still heavily reliant on you to create some structure so it can be helpful to have everything organised in terms of what you will feed them when they wake and what they will wear. But also to remember here that there is no need to put pressure on yourself to have everything just right. It doesn’t matter if you haven’t had a chance to wash up before you decide to head out for a bit of a play. No one will care if you leave the house untidy a bit or a lot. When your babies are young, I would suggest as much as possible to focus on building a connection with each child individually and simply observing them and getting to know their individual personalities and preferences. Of course, as your babies get older, a morning routine is going to come in handy particularly in preparation for school and this is important even if you are homeschooling. Routines help kids to know about expectations and responsibilities. It also encourages independence.  So, creating a morning routine that includes tasks like brushing teeth, getting dressed, and having breakfast is going to be important. One way to make mornings go more smoothly particularly when your children start school or some sort of childcare is to prepare as much as you can the night before, such as laying out clothes and packing school bags. But I would suggest doing this even before your kids start school. If you know that you want to get out of the house at a certain time the next day to attend an event or to go somewhere and it can be anywhere. For example, I remember when my boys were babies, I enjoyed going for a walk in the morning and getting a coffee at the local café. I couldn’t do this every day of course, but I looked forward to it when it was possible. And so, if I knew my partner had to leave early for work and wouldn’t be around, then I would get up before everyone else so that I was at least showered and ready. Then when my boys woke up, that was one less thing I had to do. I could focus all my attention on them. When your children are older, I think it’s important to get them involved in preparing for the next day as much as possible. Get them to choose and lay out their clothes. Get them to pack their lunches. Having a morning checklist that is hung up somewhere – wherever you have your family command centre – so for me, that would be on my fridge or somewhere in the kitchen. This way, everyone can see what they need to do to get ready in the morning and mentally tick off their tasks before they head out the door. By doing this, you may find your mornings will run more smoothly, and you'll have more time to focus on getting everyone out the door.

Now just as important is a bedtime routine. 

2.     Bedtime Routine A consistent bedtime routine is crucial for helping your children wind down and get ready for sleep. Start with calming activities like reading a book or taking a warm bath. Set a regular bedtime and stick to it as closely as possible. Having a predictable routine helps your children know what to expect and can make bedtime less stressful for everyone. This can also be a wonderful opportunity to spend some quality time with each child individually if you have another adult or caregiver to share the load but even if you are doing the bedtime routine by yourself, it can be a great opportunity to nurture your relationships. This is a time of day when some kids may struggle, particularly if they don’t want to be separated from you. If you’ve listened to my earlier podcast in Season 2, I believe it’s Episode 7 where I answer a listener’s question about co-sleeping, you will know that I still co-sleep with my twins who are now 8 years old and that’s mainly because of me responding to what they want and need at night. I recognise you might not want this for your family and your children might not even need that level of reassurance and that’s ok. I am not suggesting that co-sleeping is the only way to nurture your children at night. But what I am saying is that if you can try not to rush this process. I think sometimes what can happen is that we get so busy trying to fit everything in that by the time we are getting the kids ready for bed, we are inadvertently rushing them. And this is a time when we actually want to slow down and connect with our kids so that they feel safe and loved and ready to separate from us. Because let’s face it, after a long day of parenting, we probably are looking forward to some down time and of course, we need to get to sleep too. But having a consistent bedtime routine that is not rushed and that is calming can help everyone get a better night’s sleep. 

3.      Daytime Sleep In terms of sleep, another important consideration is daytime sleep and this is more relevant to those of you with younger children who are still napping. A lot of people will tell you that getting your multiples on the same sleep schedule is a must. And I agree if you can do that and your multiples can synchronize their naps then that’s great because this allows you to have a dedicated block of time during the day to rest, or to catch up on other tasks that you want or need to attend to. It can take some trial and error to get the timing right, but once you do, it can be a huge help to have all your multiples sleeping around the same time during the day. Of course, it would be remiss of me to not mention here that your multiples are obviously unique individuals and if you have non-identical multiples then it’s less likely, it’s not impossible, but it’s less likely that they will have the exact same sleep needs. This is because research on twins has shown that sleep quality is only moderately influenced by genetic factors. In other words, both your genes and your environment play a role in how well you sleep, in how much sleep you get and so on. So, when we are thinking about how to help our individual babies sleep, we might find that what works for one, doesn’t necessarily work for another. Working out an individualised approach for each of your multiples isn’t always easy or possible though so my biggest suggestion here is to do what works being mindful that you may not be able to force your multiples to be on the exact same schedule. But remember genetics only have a moderate influence on sleep as I said before so if you can get the environmental factors just right – that is, working out what each child’s preferences are for how to sleep more soundly and how much sleep they actually need and at what times of day – then you are in much better position to facilitate them having naps that are more synchronized than not.  One thing that I personally found helpful with daytime sleep is positioning my babies’ cots in a way where I could soothe and settle them back to sleep at the same time if they became unsettled at naptime. So I had these cots called back saver cots that were a bit higher up than other cots I’ve seen and then I stood in between and put one hand on one baby and the other hand on the other baby through the cot door. Then I would rhythmically pat them and say something calming like “shhh” until they fell asleep. Now obviously this doesn’t work so well if you have more than two babies, but I know other parents have maybe focused on whichever baby seems more unsettled and hold them while putting the others in a rocker and rocking them with their feet. I think you get the idea here that you’ll need to get creative but the takeaway message here is do whatever works for your babies as long as it’s safe and please don’t worry about having to train them to be independent sleepers. If you are worried about that you might like to check out my earlier podcast episode in Season 2, Episode 7. 

This brings me to another point I want to raise here that I’ve mentioned a bit already but that’s the importance of one-on-one time. 

4.     One-on-One Time With multiple children, it's important to spend individual quality time with each child. I would suggest aiming for regular one-on-one time with each child, even if it's just a few minutes a day. I know this can be hard if you are solo parenting or if you have a partner, but they are busy at work, and you are doing the day and night routines on your own. But even if that’s the case I would suggest looking for little moments throughout the day where you can give one child your full attention. It might be that you are changing one child while the sibling or siblings are in their high chairs, for example. Here, I’d suggest slowing down and as much as possible, really connect with the child you are interacting with. Talk to them, sing to them, look them in the eye, give them an extra cuddle, do whatever you think they would like that shows them they have your full attention. This helps strengthen your bond and ensures that each child feels valued and special. And of course, you can continue to do this as your kids get older. To be honest, sometimes the only one-on-one time I have with my twins to this day is when I’m having a conversation with one while he’s using the bathroom, and his brother is in another room waiting for him to be done.  My point is it doesn’t have to be a big, planned outing or event. Simply finding small moments of connection is often enough. 

And the last thing I want to say that I’ve alluded to already is sharing responsibilities. 

5.     Delegate and Share Responsibilities Don't be afraid to delegate tasks and share responsibilities with your partner if you have one or other family members, including your kids when they are old enough to take on those responsibilities. Parenting is not a solo enterprise, it’s a team effort, and involving others can certainly lighten your load. Whenever possible, assigning age-appropriate chores to your children can teach them responsibility and helps them contribute to the household. This might as simple as getting your kids to help pack up their toys at the end of the day. It might be getting them to help you hang the washing or put away their clothes. It might be helping you wash the dishes. Of course, depending on the age of your children it is likely that if they are still little, you will still need to supervise them and offer direction. I really see this as another way of connecting with your kids and doing an activity together rather than an exercise in having everything tidy and perfect in your household. Simply getting them involved and remembering as much as possible to make it playful, can help to encourage them to do the household chores more independently later on.  Chores don’t have to feel like work if you can incorporate some activity that is pleasant as you are completing the chores. This might be, for example, playing your kids’ favourite songs and dancing around as you pack the playroom up. To this day, when I ask my kids to put their clothes away, they naturally make it a game. For example, they might pretend they are playing basketball to see if they can accurately throw their socks in the drawer. And yes, this does mean the chore takes about 20 minutes longer than if I did it myself, but I still see the benefit in letting them do it themselves and making it playful helps them to get it done. 

Those are just a few time-saving tips and parenting hacks to help you manage life with multiples. Remember, every family is different, so find what works best for you and your children. The key is to stay organized, establish consistent routines, and involve your kids in the process. With a little planning and some creative strategies, you can make your household run more smoothly and enjoy more quality time with your family. 

I hope you found these tips helpful and as always, feel free to reach out with any questions or topic suggestions for future episodes. Until next time, take care!

Thanks for listening to today's episode. If you like what you've heard, then please follow and leave a review so that other expectant and current parents of multiples like yourself can find this podcast and the valuable information it contains. I'd be so very grateful if you left a review and shared this with anyone you think could benefit from listening. 

If you have a particular topic you'd like me to cover on this podcast, feel free to reach out to me via my website fiercekindmama.com.

New episodes are released every second Wednesday, so we’ll see you back here real soon. 

Any advice and information on this podcast is general only and has been prepared without taking into account your particular circumstances and needs for tailored, individualised advice, please consult with a qualified professional.